fragilex mom blog

The room I am painting 

picnic pic 

more picnic pics 

end of school picnic 

I painted all day. I have one coat on everything but the closet door.I like it, it looks good. I freaked out when I started painting, I discovered I didn`t wash my brush yesterday when I stopped painting. I don`t think I have ever done that. I called Lynn and asked her what I could do. She sad try washing it in hot water and lots of soap. If that didn`t use try paint thinner. Luckily the soap and water worked. I am glad it came clean because its my favorite brush. Tomorrow I`m going to do another quick coat on everything. I also plan on painting the door. Thursday I guess I will clean the floor. It is a real mess. I need to clean the bathroom too, it is gross. I guess I will pint the vanity and bench first, then the armoire. I also need to paint the mirror and rocker. I still need to clean the old dresser out. I just stuck stuff in it to get it out of the way.
I have to get some medicine tomorrow, I am as good as out.
Thats all for now.

I started to write yesterday but got distracted. It rained alost an inch yesterday. We really needed it. It may rain more tonight. Ken worked in the yard today. He put more rock around the tree next to the patio and it looks good. He also is working on enlarging the back flowerbed.
I finished putting primer on the walls in the bedroom. I also primed all the woodwork. Ken went to home depot today and got all the wrong stuff. I asked him to get some kilz and 2 roller covers. He came back with oil based kilz and I needed latex. Istead of 2 roller covers he brought me some pack that had rollers and covers and a cheap brush and drop cloth and a metal paint tray. He claimed it was so cheap with the rebate it cost about the same as just the covers. But i have real good rollers I like already and good purdy paint brushes.Metal paint trays suck too because they rust if the get scratched. So he has to take all that crap back and he didn`t do it today so I didn`t get as much done as I wanted to. I might paint the ceiling tonight if I can find a roller cover.
Ken is cooking chicken on the grill right now. Sue is on her way over to return Dannys vid cam. Greg came by earlier too. I expect Lynn to stop by later too. Its been a fun weekend overall. Ken has off tomorrow.
Guess thats all for now.

I slept really late ! When I got up I started putting the primer on the wallas in Dannys old room. I got about 3/4th of the way through when I stopped. I may paint more later.
Ken bought a new grill. He is real excited about it. It looks like a nice grill. I hope it doesn`t rain tomorrow so we can cook out.
Danny just played video games and played on here all day. We ate chinese carry out for dinner. My face is still a mess and i checked my appointment card and found out I don`t go back until the 5th of June. I`m going to call the office Monday. I hope they will be open. I`m going to try and get them to call in prescription for the aldara.
Thats aboutit. Ken is going on bike ride right now. I`m going to play some spades.

Last day of school was yesterday! I slept until 10:30 today. It was wonderful. Danny is happy playing video games. I am going to start painting Dannys old bedroom in a few minutes.
My face looks awful. The medicine is really working I guess. I have a new place burning over my left eyebrow. I don`t know when I will be able to leave the house lol. I will need more medicine before my next appointment too. I don`t know why they don`t just give me a prescription instead of doling out samples like its gold. I`m feeling bitchy, don`t know if I can still claim its PMS since I haven`t had a period since Feb. Maybe its menopause. This happened last year, I went 117 days between periods at one point. Maybe this is it though this time. I have been having hot flashes a lot the last few months. This whole getting older crap is kind of depressing. I get a complete physical June 25th (oh boy). I am going to ask for some anti- depressants. I need some mothers little helpers. Wish i knew a good quack I really need something good. All the old quacks are dead or in jail. Damn speaking of pills I need to give Danny his and make him lunch.
Okay I`m going to get off my ass and get busy.

When The Fallen Angels Fly
by Billy Joe Shaver

I have climbed so many mountains just to reach the other side
And I`ve near drowned myself in freedom just to feed my foolish pride
On my journey through the darkness I have finally seen the light
I know no one`s ever loved me like your loving me tonight

There is something you must tell me, you think I won`t understand
How you`ve found such wordly pleasures in the arms of other men
I would never try to judge you, we`ve both been wrong and right
But I know no one`s loved me like you`re loving me tonight

God will save His fallen angels and their broken wing He`ll mend
When He draws their hearts together and they learn to love again
All their sins will be forgiven in the twinkle of an eye
All saints rejoice in Heavenwhen the fallen angels fly

There`s a story in the Bible about the eagle growing old
How it grows new sets of feathers then becomes both young and strong
Then it spreads its mighty wingspan out across the open sky
We will have the wings of eagles when fallen angels fly

When the fallen angels fly
When the fallen angels fly
We will have the wings of eagles
When the fallen angels fly


This is maybe my favorite song

Live Forever
By Billy Joe and Eddie Shaver

I`m gonna live forever
I`m gonna cross that river
I`m gonna catch tomorrow now
You`re gonna wanna hold me
Just like I always told you
You`re gonna miss me when I`m gone

Nobody here will ever find me
But I will always be around
Just like the songs I leave behind me
I`m gonna live forever now

You Fathers and you Mothers
Be good to one another
Please try to raise your children right
Don`t let the darkness take `em
Don`t make `em feel forsaken
Just lead `em safely to the light

When the old world is blown asunder
And all the stars fall from the sky
Remember someone really loves you
We`ll live forever you and I

I`m gonna live forever
I`m gonna cross that river
I`m gonna catch tomorrow now

I`m gonna live forever
I`m gonna cross that river
I`m gonna catch tomorrow now

I`m gonna live forever
I`m gonna cross that river
I`m gonna catch tomorrow now

Star In My Heart
by Billy Joe Shaver

You`ll have to do the best you can good friend of mine
Someday our paths may cross again in a better time
I know, you know, you know, you know that
I pulled the thorn out of my side when i walked away
I took the rock out of my shoe on that very day
I pray , you`ll forgive me for not leaving sooner

You are the star in my heart
Guess you`ve always known
Though we are worlds apart
I`m still your friend
And friends will always be friends forever

Don`t waste your precious thoughts on me and my tired old dreams
Your soul is bursting at the seams,you are finally free, to be
Even more than you could ever dream of
You`ll learn to hold your head up high and you`ll make your stand
You`ll look the world straight in the eye, you will never blink
To think I almost held on to you too longto help you

You are the star in my heart
Guess you`ve always known
Though we are worlds apart
I`m still your friend
And friends will always be friends forever

You are the star in my heart
Guess you`ve always known
Though we are worlds apart
I`m still your friend
And friends will always be friends forever

You are the star in my heart.

I didn`t write yesterday. I took Danny to mhmr to get his script refilled. He didn`t want to go but he finally did. Then he went with Frankie to the mall. I talked to Shana while we were there and Frankie is going to come 3 times a week during the summer. I have a swollen gland in my neck., I am sure its from my face being so inflamed. I went to bed at 9:30 last night.
Tomorrow is the last day of school. I am so glad! We can relax and sleep late.I didn`t do much of anything today.

It`s Sunday so i must be listening to NPR. Last night was Dominos night. We split it, women won one ,men won one.
Ken is out working in the yard. He is enlarging the patio for the new grill he is going to get.I wish we had planned better and had the slab made bigger when we added on to the house. Hindsight is 20/20 as they say. I have chicken cooking in the crockpot. Amy is going to come over at some point and video some kid for school. I wish she would hurry because i want to go to hare`s and get some plants. I hope she doesnt come too soon because Danny is asleep in his underwear. I think i may go wake him up and give him a bath.
It`s really hot out, its supposed to be 100 today.

It`s Friday! Sue didn`t work today so I went over to her houseand Amy colored my hair. I like it, its pretty blonde. We had many discussions and i had to listen to them argue as usual. All in all it was fun and i like my hair.I had a bit of a hangover this morning and i slept in. Think I`ll lay of the vodka for a few days. Well thats about it. I`m just trying to figure out what to fix for dinner.

The picnic yesterday was fun.I helped cook hot dogs and get things set up.Everyone loved the cookies. Danny asked me a million times to take him home. It was kind of sad seeing Danny walking around all by himself. There was a merry go round at the playground and he liked that. We came home at 1:30 and took naps. I go to the dr at 11:00. I am so sleepy now but I need to stay up. I have got to get an airconditioner filter today because it is going to be in the 90`s for a while.

Its going to be hot today, they say 88. I have to be at the park at 10 so I need to leave here at 9:30. Amy isn`t going to come over this morning. She is going to come over Friday morning and highlight my hair.
I think I will go get an airconditioner filter today before i go to the park. If its going to be 88 I might want to turn on the airconditioner. I guess I will drive the caddie today since both cars need gas and i haven`t driven the caddie in weeks.
I think I`ll take a shower now. I have some fiction I want to get started writing and now is as good a time as ever.

I baked 3 different types of cookies for the picnic, lemon, chocolate chip and chocolate chip/oatmeal. I also made banana bread and a meatloaf. Totally out did myself. Totally blew my diet too which sucks!!! Well the cookies will be gone tomorrow then no more baking again. Be easier to diet if i wasn`t such a good cook. I made a huge salad I`ll just live off it for a couple of days.
I went back to sleep this morning and had the weirdest dreams. Some guy with 6 pack abs was in it and he was selling something out of an apartment. I think it was QVC i feel asleep with that on tv. And dreamed of horses. The horses were in an arena next to the apartment. Oh well time for dreamland again. Its late and i have to be at the park at 10. night blog :)

Mom called and said she won $2,800.00 and that she had a check. I had her read it all to me and its a scam. She showed up over here about 30 minutes later. I read the letter told her again it was a scam. She kept saying she would ask at the bank. Of course she never listens to me. I called the number in the letter and had a screaming fight with some African scam artist. I swear my blood pressure was going up and i finally hung up on the bastard. It said write in the letter it was a loan to insure her winnings. Damn she better not cash that check. I couldn`t just take it from her or she would think I was trying to steal her money. I have got to get Sue to write the cease and decist letter to mail to all these leeches. OKay thats my rant for the day.

Jaguar , these live in south Texas 

we found the turtles  

Danny at the zoo 

Today I went to the zoo with the special ed department from Sam. The student council went too.Our group was Ms.Nowell, Danny,Jon,Ashley, 2 studnet council girls and me. One of the student council girls was slovenina or how ever it is spelled. She said she came here to live with her brother who had run from the army. And she is married now. I think she is only 17 or 18 but at least she is here and is safe, I guess.
Danny walked so fast, he tried to just walk by everything. It was a beautiful day at least. The zoo was pretty with all the flowers blooming. There were several baby antelope and deer. We saw a crodille with a big tear. I petted an armadillo, its face looked just like an oppossum. Danny kept saying he wanted to go home but we told him he had to stay until 1:00 and he did okay after that.I told Coach Morgan we aren`t going to San Marcos and he was very understanding. He is so nice. I told him we would go next year and that Danny wanted to play baseball next year. Danny rode home from the zoo with me instead of riding the bus.
Tomorrow I have to bake cookies for the picnic Wed. I`m also getting my hair cut tomorrow.
I`m still ticked off at Ken.

It`s Sunday so a usual i have spent the last 5 hours listening to NPR(national public radio. I missed half of car talk but I can hear that next Saturday. Wait Wait Don`t Tell Me alwyas cracks me up!!It was very funny today. This American Life was good today too. I`m listening to studio 360 now.
They did a piece about Generation X on one program today (not sure which). I guess I was bone too soon because I definetly am more like an X`er than boomer. I am a classic slacker. Except I did cut Ken and Dannys hair and gave the pugs baths today. Not sure what I`ll fix for dinner. But as far as a profession I`m slacker for sure ! My most profitable year when i worked was $7000.00 in 1980. Ken always laughs when i get my annual report for social security. If I retire at 68 or whatever early is I`ll get 157 bucks a month. LoL I`m already retired so it hardly matters.

Dominos was fun last night. Thw women won, wohooo. I drank vodka collins made with Tito`s handmade vodka made in Austin,Tx. I have a bit of a hangover. My mouth is very dry. I almost feel like I`m still drunk. Ken is on a bike ride with Duke and Bernie. They were going to ride to Possum Kingdom Lake. I think I`ll give Danny and the pugs bathes. The bathroom needs cleaning so its a good time to wash the dogs. I need to do something constructive today. It`s going to be a busy week. Only 8 school days left this year. Danny will probably stay home this Friday since everyone will be going to special olympics. Well not everyone will be going but lots will.So I guess there are only 7 days left. Okay its bath time. I`ll write more later if i get inspired.

Dominos night,party til you puke 

Last night I dreamed that a little(not too attractive) little girl was in my yard and there were hummingbirds flying about.Birds in my dream book mean spirital freedom, ability yo soar to higher awareness. Freedom from material ties. Hmmmmm since I dreamed of hummingbirds( the smallest of birds) maybe I will just become a little more aware, soar not so high. And I will have to look up what the ugly kid means. That figures the ugly kid is me.
I am not working on the hall today.Ken did put the vent covers on so it looks much better. There is always tomorrow.
We had a really big thunderstorm last night. I shut down the dell and went to bed. I woke up hot as hell because the power had gone off. The wind was incredibly loud before the storm and the thunder and lightening were right around here. Ken took his new sleeping pill, the one I found in the fragile x book and he liked it. Said he didn`t have any hung over feeling today. I think he really needs to take 2 though. He said he will next time. I forgot to give Danny his paxil last night. It is the first one he has missed, my bad.
I`m not sure if we are playing dominos tonight because I can`t find Sue. I called all her numbers too, home work and cell. I guess I`ll call Amy and see if she knows where she is.Ok talked to Amy and Sue was at her company pinic and is on her way home. Amy is going to come over Wed morning and make me a blonde again. I`m getting my hair more layered Tues. I want is more wild!!! Wild and blonde, sounds like fun to me. Monday I may go to the zoo with Dannys school. Wed I am going to Stovall Park for the end of the year picnic.
Thats all for now.

Ernie and Cookie 

Cookie  

ken on the guzzi 

Ken , my husband  

Billy Joe  

The doctors office called Wed. and the biopsy was positive. I go the 25Th to discuss treatment options. The medicine I`m using makes my face hurt and its red.
I think I have decided we are not going to San Marcos for state special olympics. I really don`t want to spend the money. It would probably cost about $400.00. I would rather put that money towards a new computer so Danny can have one in his room. I also don`t want to be in the sun that much right now with this medicine. I hate not going though. He can compete for the rest of his life though so it`s not like it is his only chance. I know it will make Ken happy if we don`t go. I`d rather take Danny to cabin in Ark. for a couple days this summer possibly. I guess I`ll call Coach Morgan Monday and let him know.
I am almost finished painting in the hall !!! :)

Me Xmas `04 

Danny at the Parks Mall 

I actually posted a picture, wohooooo . Hope I can do that again :)

Billy Joe Shaver  

Today was a busy day. I went to home depot and got some more paint. I painted the door to Greg`s old room. All I have to do now is put the doorknob back on and hang it.Tomorrow I am going to paint the bedroom door and all the doors in the hall will be done. I plan to have it finished this weekend!!! I bought the rod to hang Dannys medals on.
Ken and I went to Callaways for dinner while Danny was out with Frankie.
Sue and Greg came by this evening.

The low last night was 68. Its going to be almost 90 today.
Just 11 days of school left, wohoo. Dannys teacher came yesterday for home training. We just have one session left. She thinks his meds(paxil) is helping. I need to make reservations for a hotel in San Marcos. It will be here before I know it.
I`m still painting doors. I just sanded the bondo on Greg`s old door. I think it will look fine. I sure am glad we have a palm sander, it makes sanding so much easier.
I still haven`t heard from my doctors office yet. I go next Thursday.
Uncle Bill called last night. We talked about mom and Christine.He also told me George is freelancing making jewelery. I want him to make a ring for Ken.
Okay I`m going to stop now.I could write more but I need to get busy.

Happy mothers day all you mothers reading this(if any). I got awakened at 9:00 with a telephone call from Tommy. I didn`t go to sleep until 3 last night. I got some flowers from Ken and shalimar from Danny and Greg got me a hybiscus tree with a braided trunk.Tommy said he got me something with diamonds, can`t wait to see what it is. He has to ship it and I told him to be sure and insure it.
Its cloudy today and we are supposed to get rain. I`ve been using my face medicine and it makes my face itch!!!
Last night Mike and Sue came over and we played dominos. It was fun as always. I tried to get some viagra from Mike but he is out too damnit. I weeded my flowerbeds yesterday. I have passion vine growing everywhere!! I can`t wait til it flowers.
okay I`m going to go take a shower and go to my moms so I can come home and take a nap.Write more later.

Okay just got back and the biopsy is over. It wasn`t too bad. My lip is swollen up with lidacane. I look kind of like Goldie Hawn in first wives club, okay I don`t but my lip does. She gave me some samples to start using on my red bump. They may biopsy it next time.
I forgot to write Wed. Dannys lawyer came and she was real nice. There should be no trouble with the guardianship. Also Karen came for in home training. We took Danny to CVS and got his paxil and went to blockbuster and Red Oven.

I went to the dermatologist yesterday and since I have to be premedicated because of my heart murmur I have to go back today and have a biopsy on my lip what a long sentence. The nurse said its probably a basal cell carcinoma. I am not looking forward to this!! But the nurse or physicians assistance or whatever she is said they could probably treat the damn little cancer topically. The little red bump on my face maybe be one too. I have to leave in 15 minutes for the doctors office.
Dannys mhmr nurse just called to check on how his meds are going. I told her about the runaround and that he has only been on them 2 days. She said she would call back in a couple weeks.
I had a weird dream yesterday. I was in a house trying to sleep and rats were in the room and one was trying to bite me.
I don`t remember my dream from last night.
When I get home from the drs. I have to fold clothes! I have 4 baskets to fold. I also need to get back to painting.
Okay I`ll write more later.

I`m still painting doors. I`m waiting on paint to dry right now. I really want this door done today. Its the door to the furnace and its first thing you see when you walk in the front door.
Danny`s lawyer comes today about guardianship. The house is a mess. My dining room is where I`m painting all the doors.
I slept so good last night I don`t remember if i dreamed. I was so tired last night. I painted until after midnight.
The weather is yucky. Its only in the 50`s - 60`s and cloudy.
Okay I`m going to get busy now.

Last night I dreamed I was at a real fancy house. I thought it was Ray Charles house. It was really more a ranch than house. There were a lot of people there. I don`t know if it was horse sale or what but we were all talking about horses and i was shown pictures of a cross country course that was set up on the side of a tropical mountain. I think my mother was there as she asked how I think I`d do on that course and I said with my fear of heights I don`t think I would even do it. Then we were all getting ready for dinner and I didn`t have any toiletries.I had to borrow a razor to shave my legs. The room was like a big dorm room or barracks with bunk beds. When we went to dinner I was sitting next to Billy Joe Shaver. And we started kissing and he was rubbing my leg and side and it was getting hot heavy. I got up to get something and damnit that was the end of my dream. I told Ken about it at lunch and he said you shouldn`t have gotten up. I don`t even know why I got up,I sure wish I hadn`t.
Guess I`ll go put another coat of paint on the door.

I`m glad the weekend is over. Ken went on his motorcycle trip Thursady and i hardly slept at all the night he was gone. I also had the strangest dream when I did finally go to sleep. I dreamed about being in a cabin and a fox was in there with me howling. After the cabin I was at stage west but it wasn`t at the theater it was outside. Jakie was in a cherry picker and was cutting grapevine off some power lines and there was huge explosion and i had dirt all in my mouth but noone was hurt.Then i dreamed I was driving a car and my mom was with me and she kept grabbing the steering wheel saying she wanted to drive. After that i was in a doctors office with mom and when we were leaving she lost her sunglasses that were big and white like something Elton John would wear. We found them and left on Ken`s BMW motorcycle. I was driving and a bunch of bikes passed us knocking off my shoe. A cop passed us going the other way and turned around , i thought he was going to give me a ticket but he brought me back my shoe. It was one of my strangest dreams. I wrote it down as soon as i woke up.
Ken hit a turkey buzzard on his trip. It broke his headlight. Luckly it didn`t hit his windshield . He had fun on his trip though and he brought me a tshirt for The Bluebonnet cafe. I wish he could have brought me some pie too. They make the best pie!!!
Tommy called and he has a Georgia drivers lisence and checking account and a credit card. Maybe he is finally growing up. He will be driving Adams car now because Adam got another DWI.
Amy videoed Danny doing laundry for a class at school and then took him to the mall Saturday. She came back Sunday and videoed some more. He did really well.Danny also had a ball game Saturday and he played this time .He acted like he wasn`t going to play at first but then he did. He got hit in the face by a wild pitch but was ok .
I played spades tonight and talked to Bob. He is really sweet. The zone is such a Peyton place though it can get just plain silly sometimes.
Okay I`m going to bed I have to paint tomorrow.